A Problematic Profession

I can't sleep, so I decided to post a Canterbury Tale-esque poem I had to write for English last year :)
Enjoy:
p.s. sorry to those that like Dr. Phil...I had to pick someone to pick on :)


In a world filled with issues and problems,
Lies one bold enough to try and solve them.
Thriving on pain and misery of all,
He will gladly take part in your downfall.
With silly advice, the bald one assists.
How has he been allowed to persist?
With a large gut and a bright, shiny head,
He would spout nonsense to even the dead!
He looks prim and proper dressed in his suit
With a questionable degree to boot!
This doctor tries to prove others are wrong;
He preys on lives of the weak all day long.
Mocking those with troubled, difficult lives
Like husbands having fun without their wives.
Offering out fifteen seconds of fame,
It’s trash T.V. and Dr. Phil’s to blame.
He’s pessimistic, a cynic, at best;
Constantly putting families to the test.
But he should look at his own life with terror,
For in the town of issues, he’s the mayor.